Supporting Neurodiverse Families Through School Anxiety
Posted on 8th January 2025 at 13:07
By Julie Wales, Family & Special Needs Counsellor
January often brings a fresh start, but for many neurodiverse families, it also brings renewed challenges—particularly around school anxiety. The transition back to school after a holiday break can be overwhelming for young people who struggle with emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA).
At NeuroThrive CIC, we understand the unique challenges that come with balancing family life, neurodiversity, and educational needs. That's why we're running workshops in January on EBSA, followed by a focus in February on navigating the EHCP (Education, Health, and Care Plan) pathways.
Understanding EBSA
Occurs when a child or young person feels intense emotional distress about attending school. Leading to frequent absences or complete refusal to go.
This distress can stem from various factors, including:
- Anxiety or mental health challenges
- Developmental or sensory difficulties
- Social challenges, including bullying
- Transitions or significant changes in routine
EBSA is not a ‘choice’ or a result of defiance but a response to overwhelming stress or unmet needs.
It requires understanding and support from schools, families, and professionals to help the young person re-engage with education.
Many families feel a deep emotional toll when their child is struggling to attend school. There's often a mix of guilt, frustration, and exhaustion as parents try to support their child’s well-being while also navigating education systems that may not fully understand their child’s needs.
The Impact on Family Life
When a child experiences school anxiety, it affects the whole family:
- Morning routines become battles
- Parents may need to take time off work
- Siblings may feel overlooked
This can create a cycle of stress that feels never-ending. But there is hope, and support is available.
Small Steps to Support Your Child
Here are some practical tips to help ease school anxiety:
1. Validate their feelings
- Let your child know their feelings are heard and understood.
- “I can see this feels really hard for you. Let’s figure it out together.”
2. Focus on small wins
- Break the school day into manageable steps.
- Instead of “You have to go to school,” try: “Let’s work on getting to the front gate today.”
3. Collaborate with the school
Building a supportive relationship with the school is essential. Share what strategies work best for your child at home, and advocate for reasonable adjustments in the classroom.
How Counselling Can Help...
Counselling offers a safe, supportive space for both parents and young people to explore their feelings, build resilience, and develop coping strategies. Here's how it can make a difference:
For Children and Young People
- Processing emotions: School anxiety often brings overwhelming feelings of fear, shame, and frustration. Counselling helps children name these emotions and find ways to manage them.
- Building self-esteem: Many young people with EBSA feel they’re “failing” or “different.” Counselling can help them rebuild their confidence and see their unique strengths.
- Developing coping skills: Practical strategies such as relaxation techniques, grounding exercises, and managing anxiety triggers can make a real difference in reducing their stress levels.
For Parents
- Emotional support: It’s easy for parents to feel isolated and exhausted when dealing with school anxiety. Counselling provides a space to talk openly without judgment and process the emotional load that comes with parenting a neurodiverse child.
- Parenting strategies: Counselling can offer practical advice on setting boundaries, creating calm routines, and responding to anxiety in a way that promotes connection and trust.
- Strengthening relationships: EBSA can strain family relationships. Counselling helps parents and children rebuild trust, improve communication, and navigate challenges as a team.
Counselling Brings the Bigger Picture Into Focus
Sometimes, when you’re in the middle of a challenging situation, it can feel impossible to see a way forward. Counselling helps families step back, reflect, and gain a clearer perspective on what’s really happening.
It can also remind families that it’s OK to ask for help. You don’t have to navigate school anxiety or family life alone. Contact Julie who can help.
How NeuroThrive CIC Can Help...
Our January EBSA workshops will cover:
- Understanding the root causes of school anxiety
- Strategies to support your child at home and at school
- Building collaborative relationships with schools
- Tools to boost your child’s confidence and emotional resilience
In February, we’ll shift our focus to helping parents navigate the EHCP pathways—an essential process for ensuring your child receives the right support in school.
Join Our Community
At NeuroThrive CIC, we believe that no family should feel alone in their journey. Our workshops are designed to provide practical strategies, a safe space to share experiences, and expert guidance on navigating challenges.
Interested in attending? Keep an eye on our website and social media for workshop dates and sign-up information: www.neurothrive.org.uk.
Final Thoughts...
School anxiety can feel overwhelming, but with the right tools and support, it’s possible to build a pathway forward that works for your family.
Remember, you are your child’s biggest advocate and their safe place. By working together—with schools, professionals, and other families—you can create a future where your child feels seen, understood, and empowered to thrive.
Call Julie Wales: 07412651894
Email: hello@juliewalescounselling.co.uk
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